A Trip to the Pool

        Today I will tell you about this time when I went to the park. One time I went to the park. The reason for this was that I wanted to go swimming. All of my friends are faggots so they were like swimming is gay, and I was like well that's perfect for you. And they were like, you know what I mean. And then I was like whatever dickfag I'll go myself. So that's what I did.
I went in my car and I then I parked it in a spot. Then I got out. And then I was like oh shit, because I realized I forgot to put on my swimming suit at home. And then the way I saw it I had two options. I could put on my suit in the parking lot in my car or in the locker room with other dudes and also the floor is disgusting like what you would find in a locker room at a public pool. So I was like alright fine, I'll just change in the car and that's fine. So I took off my pants and then my butt was on my leather and it was sticking to it because it was hot. Then I put on my swimming suit and after I looked down and there was a brown stain on my seat and I was like oh hell no.
        So then what I did was this. I smelled the brown and could not identify it as poop. So I was like well I need to know what this shit is lol roflmao. So I stuck my finger in my butt and moved it around a little bit. Then I took it out and put it by my nose and it didn't smell like the stuff on the seat. So needless to say I was very relieved.
        So then I went to the pool entrance and the guy was like, you need a locker, bro, and I said no thanks and went into the pool area. I put down my towel and I was like if anybody fucking touches my towel, my glasses, or my five dollars of snack money then there will be shit to pay. So then I went and jumped in the water and it was awesome. I swam around and then I left. I didn't take a shower there, but I had to take a leak and forgot to put on my flip flops, so I got athlete's foot anyway.